Plugging along

I am totally in survival mode.  There is always a period of survival mode any time you have a new baby in the house, and so it's not totally a new experience.    I was doing laundry a couple days ago (what a triumph!) and as I sorted the five piles for the five people in this house, I realized my own pile had, like, two things in it and that was it.  Where were all my clothes?  Had I forgotten to put them in the hamper?  I thought about it for a second, then looked down at what I was wearing and it dawned on me.  I had only worn my robe for 4 days, and when you never get dressed, you never actually have dirty clothes to wash.  I will count this as one advantage of this time of isolation.  

Here's a successful day:  My children were fed, every medicine was administered on time, I brushed my teeth.  Anything above that is a major accomplishment.  This weekend I actually cooked a meal and baked some cookies and I felt like Martha Stewart.  My family raved about the simple spaghetti dinner and I felt like I had conquered the world.  Now if I could just get on a pair of non-maternity jeans... I still have about a million pounds to lose first, but I'll get there.

Everyone is doing well.  Caleb had a biopsy this week and it was a big deal and if I wasn't in survival mode and sleep-deprived, I would've been more nervous for it.  Fortunately, we got the results back Friday afternoon and it was ALL good news.  Caleb's new heart still has NO rejection!  The day at Riley went great, we got to see some dear friends and it felt like visiting our other home.  Caleb did well, he is SO incredible about having procedures.  The only issue he has right now is his blood pressure has been very high at times, and the team has been concerned.  They decided to add another medicine to our long list, and since that day his bp has been much better, but still not quite as low as they'd like to see it.  At least it's not scary-high any more, but every time I check it, I want to see a nice, low number.  Praying that it improves!

Lucy is growing and is such a sweet baby.  She sleeps through the utter chaos created by Caleb and Jonah's daily adventures.  They literally wrestle and tackle each other right beside her and she doesn't even stir.  She is starting to outgrow her newborn clothes and when I notice her little feet pushing against the feet of her sleepers, I think, "Oh yeah, they get bigger SO fast."  I noted out loud that her pajamas were too small tonight after their baths and Jonah said, "Don't you just wish she would stay this little forever?" and I thought, "What are you, a grown-up now?" He poses a good question... On one hand I wish this stage of life, when my children are so little, would last forever.  On the other hand, I happily anticipate when they are a little more self-sufficient.  Oh the joys and stress of being a mom!

Thanks for your prayers as we keep plugging along!  This new normal is starting to sink in and what we need most right now is prayers that we can all transition well.  Daniel is settling back in to his job, I'm adjusting to staying home all the time, Jonah is dealing with getting less attention than his siblings, Caleb is adjusting to life outside the hospital, and Lucy is adjusting to life outside my stomach.  In a few months the stress will be less... right?!  :)  Thanks for all the love, prayers, cards, gifts and meals that show us that we are remembered... we are so blessed by the army of people who care for our family!

An Overdue Update

Lucy Ann has arrived and everyone in this house is smitten with her.  If there was ever any question about how it would be to have a new baby and a newly transplanted 2-year old to deal with simultaneously, let me give you a definitive answer: the timing has been WONDERFUL.  There is SO much happiness in this house!  It helps that Lucy is a dreamboat who sweetly sleeps most of the day and is so low-key that I forget sometimes there's a baby in the house.  Although, I can't say her entrance into this world was low-key.  So much for "when should we schedule the c-section"... Lucy decided to make her appearance on her own time.  She was born on Sunday October 27 and she came so fast that even though our hospital doesn't do VBACs, there was no time for an anesthesiologist to get there.  We arrived at the hospital at 3:40 and she was born, with no drugs and lots of freaking out by docs and nurses, at 4:25.  Not at all what I was expecting!  But I'm so glad it went that way, because I was discharged the next day and haven't had to recover from major surgery!

I am one busy woman.  I am very proud of getting through each day, especially the days when I take a shower.  (I'm averaging about 1 out of every 3 days.)  I'm getting Caleb's meds down pretty well, and getting comfortable with his routine, but now of course I've thrown a newborn into the mix.  Needless to say, I don't really ever stop moving.  But we're happy.... I feel like I have everything I could ever want.  Caleb is SO full of life and joy, Jonah is over the moon to have his brother by his side and a new sister to love on.  Lucy is sweet and content and easily handles the insane noise level in our home.  Daniel is a puddle of mush with his new daughter.  At night, when the boys are getting ready for bed, I bring the baby in and all five of us climb into our bed and read together.  Jonah usually can't keep his hands off Lucy, or maybe Caleb wants to be on my lap, and there ends up being a lot of shifting and switching places before everyone is satisfied with who they are sitting next to (or on top of).  It is a messy pile of love.

It feels surreal to think of our days spent in a hospital room.  It feels like someone else's life now because honestly I've been too busy to even think about what all has happened in my life in the last few weeks.  Last night I looked at some pictures from the hospital for the first time since we've been home and it was kind of upsetting, seeing Caleb hooked up to the machines.  To think about how drastically and how suddenly life has changed is almost overwhelming.  Every time I've left the house, people approach me, people I know and often total strangers who ask if I'm Caleb's mom.... they tell me they follow this blog and share with me how our story has impacted them.  And it's so strange because it feels like they are talking about someone else's life.  Was that me that went through all that?  Was that really just a few weeks ago?  Did we really survive all that and actually come through to the other side as a happy, whole family of five?  What a crazy year it's been.

We are enjoying every day.  And we are tired every day.  :)  We are thankful and still a little bit in shock.  Life is so weird!  That's it for tonight.  I have exactly one hour before Caleb's last medicine of the day (11:00 pm) then I will attempt to sleep some before I start getting up to feed Lucy.  Much love from all five Kinnairds and good night!